16 Mar Part of Getting to Know Myself Has Been Getting to Know the Parts Which Hurt

What have you discovered as you explored the query, ‘Who Am I?’ has yourself revealed more of themselves to you or are you still confused.

If confused I would like to suggest this is not a bad thing at all. The reason I say this is there is a lot to unpack when it comes to getting to know yourself. And some of this stuff comes late at night when you’re not able to sleep, or at obscure moments when the mind is not as occupied by day to day responsibilities and tasks. 

If you don’t have enough of these moments in your life you may need to create some.

Perhaps the next time you take a bath. Slow down and rather than rush the process – take time to breathe and let your attention go within. Perhaps before you go to bed at night before you put your head down, spend a few moments to still the mind putting the query, ‘Who Am I?’ out into the cosmos so that you can allow the universe to download answers. Don’t be surprised if they don’t come all at once.

If your process is anything like mine it’s like an ongoing dialogue where thoughts, feelings and memories pass across my mind and sometimes a revelation comes through and I realise something which I either was not aware of before, or which I have not really considered properly.

Part of getting to know myself, I’ll be honest has been getting to know the parts which hurt.

As I have allowed myself the mental emotional space to breathe and connect with myself I have discovered how tired I am, how many enormous challenges I have had to overcome and how many times I have simply felt the need to ‘man up’ and press right through.

When I realise how much of an impact this has had upon me I have had to grieve these wounds and acknowledge wounds I have allowed life to inflict upon me. 

So part of getting to know the answer to, ‘Who Am I?, for me has been getting to know the meaning of my journey so far, what has life and the universe been trying to teach me.

What mistakes can I ensure don’t happen again? What has life shown me about seizing opportunities and learning how to recognise opportunities when they present themselves in light of the many that I’ve inadvertently missed in the past. 

Loving myself is the next step, because when I realise my faults, mistakes and fuck ups it’s easy to beat myself up, and it’s easy to be self critical and to become weighed down by the things I discover within myself.

It’s important therefore to celebrate the good things, to be empathic and understanding towards the things which my past have contained. And to recognise that my past is the past and the point of this exercise is to integrate the depth of who I am with the many experiences that make me who I am.