"What's Your Idea of a Man?"

We’ve been doing some exciting work in this series of articles; what your about to read continues a journey which we began with ‘self-discovery’.

After establishing a sense of one’s own identity, the next logical step I believe is to consider ‘where best do I fit?’,- where can I position myself for the greatest possible yield, both for myself and anyone who has to come in contact with me.

But now, having laid this foundation before we get into practical matters like; Business, finances and recreation; and relationship issues like romantic relations, family dynamics and masculine friendship, I want to further equip you with the armour to survive as you in the earth.

To do this we’re going to cover four concepts over the next four articles which will begin with this one, once I get going. This article is titled; ‘What are you building?’- The idea behind asking this question is again to establish firm foundations on which to build the rest of our lives.

So, what indeed are you building? See you get born, you suffer and die. This morbid perspective is the lived experience of many of your contemporaries, and that is not exclusive to the lion’s share of humanity who live in poverty, or whose lives are dogged by illness, disease or disability. Or the myriad other obvious maladies that could be your portion.

In fact, externally you may display all the trappings of success, you may indeed be blest with some of the best that life and love has to offer. And yet…

Because life is simply not perfect, there are ways in which pain and suffering in their various expressions imbed themselves into the seemingly most serene and pristine existences.

I highlight this reality however not to be morbid, but to make you aware of an exciting opportunity; it doesn’t matter where you are now or how you got there on this journey of life, every moment is a new opportunity!

And that means you can press the refresh button on life by pressing the reset on your mind.

In order to affect this paradigm shift in perspective, we have been embracing the journey of self-discovery, establishing ‘who we are’ and ‘what we want’.

If your like many of us who have lived with a myriad obligations and imperatives laid out for you externally, (from others), establishing yourself as the master of your ship and sitting in the driving seat of your own life changes everything.

No longer are you at the behest of whims, moods, ideologies and societal constructs, you have established for yourself a working definition of what you want.

This is good, but now how do you build it. I don’t know what you want and I don’t know the route you will have to take to get there. But I do know how to get from A to B.

It’s necessary to establish where A is. As in where are you now on this journey towards what you actually want out of this game of life.

And where is B, what for you is the destination. Now you need to map your course. Mapping your course is the process of asking the relevant questions involved in asking and answering ‘What are you building?’

What resources are you going to need to arrive at your shore, and where will you get them from?

Which ones will you need to start with, what do you need to give up to become lean and mean and to cut through the obstacles you will inevitably face.

If the why is big enough, the how’s will take care of themselves said John DeMartini.

All this stuff is worth writing down, stuff that is written down gets done – a lot of people who’ve got a lot of stuff done have told us that.


Get a pen and paper and plot point A and point B these are the blue prints of your master plan. Oh did I not tell you it is mastery we are after here. Remember you are the master of your ship. Therefore, let’s be clear mastery is the game we are playing here.

Building a life for you which has meaning to you requires focus. Charles F Hannel in the Master Key says;

‘The power of attention can be more readily understood by comparing it with a magnifying glass in which the rays of sunlight are focused. They possess no particular strength as long as the glass is moved about and the rays directed from one place to another. But let the glass be held perfectly still and let the rays be focused on one spot for any length of time, the effect will become apparent.’

You’ll be surprised what you can achieve when you put your mind to it.

The biggest edifices in the world are built one block at a time, so don’t be daunted by the task. If you’ve been honest with yourself about what you’re after, it’s time to start pursuing it with the passion and ambition your dreams and goals deserve.

Written by

Hi I'm Omar Zac Phillips and I’m a writer. My Blog; theideaofaman.com is where I journal my experiences as a man and share The Idea of a Man Project, a 12 step process of self-discovery.

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